We wish you a Merry Sensory Overload

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I know it’s premature, and i know that i’ll be really sick of it by Christmas day, but our tree went up this weekend. And now i need to brace myself for 4 weeks of overtired, over excited, slightly delirious kids.

I’m easily over stimulated at the best of times – i hate noise, bright lights, scratchy textures – but Christmas is a whole other level of sensory overload.

Here’s some tips for avoiding sensory overload at home during this excitable festive period:

  • Declutter. I know, i know, how is that possible at this time of year? Cards, decorations, kids off school. I’m trying not to get too attached to ‘stuff’, ditching post once its been read, putting toys away before bed etc etc.
  • Minimise screen time. This time of year is brilliant for TV/Movies generally, but i try to only switch the box on when theres something i/we want to watch – instead of leaving it on all the time as background noise. (I hate that!!!)
  • Pay attention to lighting (not too bright! And maybe forego the ‘flashing’ option on the tree lights…), noise volume, and heat. A ‘hot’ house can make for ‘hot’ tempers.
  • Try to achieve a balance of activities through the day – activity, followed by rest time, followed by refuelling etc.
  • Set limits for duration of activities – screen time, social time, phone calls, interactions, exposure to crowds and noise. How long can you/your kids tolerate these before they begin to irritate? Make sure to stop them before that stage is reached.
  • Rest. Sleep in (I wish!), lounge on the sofa, plan activities for the afternoon. This time of year, more than ever, its important to make sure you/your kids get enough rest.

Ok. Thats it. I’ll try my best to do all of this (because i haven’t achieved it any year before!).

Here goes December – i’m coming in.

See you on the other side!

 

 

5 Reasons kids should be walking to school

Unfortunately my son’s (our chosen) school is too far away for us to walk there.

I’ve given us a week to get accustomed to the early morning routine, and now, i plan to drive some of the way and make us walk the rest (perhaps a mile or so). And here’s why:

  1. Daylight. Do i really need to explain why this is a good thing? Exposing our kids to daylight helps us synchronise important biorhythms, it is critical for promoting alertness, it raises our mood, and helps us to produce vitamin D.
  2. Exercise. When i was a kid, we didn’t need to ‘exercise’. Playing was exercise, because playing was not sitting, or being indoors, it was running and riding bikes and building camps. However, sometimes today’s kids need a little extra help to get the right amount of exercise, and its important because it helps maintain the right body weight, builds strong muscles and bones and improves the quantity and quality of sleep we achieve.
  3. Air. Ok i accept that depending upon where you live, your child may or may not be able to gulp lung fulls of ‘fresh air’, but regardless, they need ventilation. And arguably, the quality of indoor air can be far worse than the quality of outdoor air, even if you live in the city. Imagine all of those bugs coming out of snotty little noses and circulating around the classroom. Lovely.
  4. Sensory (proprioceptive) input. Kids need heavy work. I don’t mean sewing in a clothing factory, or working a production line. I mean, pushing, pulling, lifting, moving. Heavy resistance and input to the muscles and joints is essential for sensory processing and has a calming effect on the nervous system. Walking provides your child with calming sensory input.
  5. Time. Walking to school gives you and your child precious ‘now’ time to talk, share and reconnect. Or complain and drag heels….as the case may be!

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Letting the kids talk to strangers

I took my boys to the beach yesterday with our big gangly dog. Nothing strange there. We do this every day.

Anyway, I digress. I took my boys to the beach yesterday, and whilst we were there a man arrived with a bucket, wearing waders and proceeded to wander out into the shallows.

It was a very low tide. Lower than I’ve seen it for a long time, and there were small pools exposed, and rocks covered in green slime, and shells and the spaghetti-like cases left by sand worms. And the man stopped by one of these pools, kneeled on the wet sand and began dipping his hands into the water and under the rocks.

It, obviously, caught our attention, and I found myself thinking that here was another great opportunity to let my eldest son ( for the youngest can’t speak yet…) practice talking with a stranger.

Talking with a stranger!!!!! Yes, you read that correctly.

See, the thing is, I know we’re all supposed to be frightened of talking to strangers. And we’re supposed to teach our kids that stranger = danger. But I just get can’t to grips with that.

We live in the north east of England. Up here the people are (for the best part) notoriously friendly.  We chat on the bus, in the street, on the doorstep. We don’t think anything of striking up conversation with folks we might stand next to in the supermarket aisle, or people smiling at us at the bus stop. And smiling…..that’s great shit isn’t it? Costs nothing and makes your day.

I’ve taught my eldest to smile at folks. I’ve also taught him to say hello if someone sits next to him. To say ‘excuse me’ to the shop assistant if he wants something. He’s only 4 (nearly 5) but I’ve encouraged him to approach the lady behind the counter, to speak to the bus driver, to say ‘good morning’ to fellow dog walkers.

And I encouraged him to approach the man in the waders, and ask him what he was doing. I knew what he was doing. But I saw this as another chance for my son to practice politely approaching someone. And of course, to learn something new.

The man responded with kindness. Maybe it’s because we live in the north. But he took the time to answer my son. They both smiled. My son came skipping back to me, buoyant with the new information he had. Excited that he had learnt something new. And confident that he could approach someone he didn’t know.

I had watched from a distance. I knew he was ‘safe’. And I was glowing with pride to overhear his beautiful little voice start “excuse me….”.

How can we teach our kids independence, if we are to control who they speak to? And how they speak to them?

There are so many skills I am trying to teach my kids. Surely, one of the most important is how we integrate into our society, how we make friends, how we talk to others.

I’m not prepared to teach my children to be afraid of strangers.